General Conference

I haven't posted in a while because I've been waiting for the transcripts from our church's most recent General Conference to come out. If you don't know what that is, click here for more information. I was absolutely blown away by what I heard last weekend, and that's a good thing. I feel like so many of the messages given by our leaders were meant just for me. I love coming away from Conference knowing exactly what I need to do to be better. I am such a task-oriented person...

One talk that especially stood out to me--no, it was more than that: this talk jumped off the screen at me--was by Sister Julie B. Beck on Sunday morning, entitled "Mothers Who Know." (Click to either listen to or read it.) It was such a beautiful, clear description of who we as mothers need to be, without apology or equivocation. I just wanted to share some of the feelings I had while I watched this and as I've thought about it since.

Sister Beck: "Mothers who know are nurturers... To nurture means to cultivate, care for, and make grow. Therefore, mothers who know create a climate for spiritual and temporal growth in their homes. Another word for nurturing is homemaking. Homemaking includes cooking, washing clothes and dishes, and keeping an orderly home. Home is where women have the most power and influence; therefore, Latter-day Saint women should be the best homemakers in the world... Nurturing mothers are knowledgeable, but all the education women attain will avail them nothing if they do not have the skill to make a home that creates a climate for spiritual growth. Growth happens best in a "house of order," and women should pattern their homes after the Lord's house (see D&C 109). Nurturing requires organization, patience, love, and work. Helping growth occur through nurturing is truly a powerful and influential role bestowed on women."

Me: The world shuns the idea that women should be expected to be homemakers. It hears the words "cooking, cleaning, etc" and doesn't want to own up to them. We hear them and think, "I'm better than that--I'm worth more than those menial tasks." But Sister Beck places the correct amount of importance on those tasks, much more than the world will ever do. And she does not apologize for this, because it is in the cooking, the cleaning, the organization--the literal home making--that makes my home a place for the Spirit to reside, a place where we can feel peace and grow together toward eternity. There is extreme importance in these duties, and they should not be overlooked or put aside--especially not in the pursuit of other, less worthy aspirations, even if they are more fun or may seem more immediately rewarding.

I have always made great efforts (ie: spent almost all of my time) to keep a clean and organized home, cook the meals that my family eats, and work hard to make our home a comfortable place for everyone who comes into it. But honestly, I have never really thought about why I do this. I just had wonderful examples in my mother and mother-in-law, who both taught me that that is what good moms do :o) But Sister Beck was able to vocalize the feelings that have been in my heart for so long--she put words to my desires and goals! How comforting to feel understood and uplifted in my efforts, to know that I am on the right track--with a long way to go, but on the right track nonetheless...

Sister Beck: "Mothers who know build children into future leaders and are the primary examples of what leaders look like. They do not abandon their plan by succumbing to social pressure and worldly models of parenting. These wise mothers who know are selective about their own activities and involvement to conserve their limited strength in order to maximize their influence where it matters most... Mothers who know do less. They permit less of what will not bear good fruit eternally. They allow less media in their homes, less distraction, less activity that draws their children away from their home. Mothers who know are willing to live on less and consume less of the world's goods in order to spend more time with their children—more time eating together, more time working together, more time reading together, more time talking, laughing, singing, and exemplifying. These mothers choose carefully and do not try to choose it all."

Me: WOW. Did she read my mind lately or what? I've been feeling like I am so busy doing that I don't have time to just sit and read and play with and enjoy my boys. Why do I feel like I have to do it all? I don't consider myself someone who's always comparing myself to other people--so what's the standard I'm holding myself up to? I think it's my expectation of myself--what I THINK a mom should be and do for her children. That's where the problem lies. My expectation is distorted... and I don't think I'm alone. I KNOW I'm not alone. When Sister Beck got choked up when she said, "These mothers choose carefully and do not try to choose it all," I think she's had some experience with that. So there's hope for me :o)

Elder Dallin H. Oaks also gave an incredible Conference talk that goes hand-in-hand with Sister Beck's, entitled "Good, Better, Best." Click here to read it.

I just can't say enough about what General Conference did for me this last week. I have analyzed my schedule (and will continue to re-evaluate) as I try to bring myself back to the basics--to what is REALLY important in this life. So if I'm not posting as much as usual, that's probably why. Don't worry, I'm still there and will update when I can, but frankly it's just another thing to add to the pile. You know I can't resist the urge to say something when I want to... so keep checking back. I'm just still working on a way to balance out this whole blogging thing :o)

I've told you my thoughts about everything--I'd love to hear about yours. Am I out there in the dark on my musings, or do you know what I'm talking about? How do you feel about your role in the home? Are there things you want to improve? Or maybe you had a different favorite Conference talk--what was it?

Yikes, that was a long one...